Today was Fast Sunday:
In my church the first Sunday of every month is a day to dedicate to prayer for a special purpose and to go without food for a day (or 2 meals in our house).
It is a time of reflection, spiritual growth and of overcoming physical desires. Also on these Sundays there is a time dedicated during our church meetings for people to come up and share the thoughts that are in their hearts or "bare their testimonies".

I had an interesting moment of reflection today. A little over a week ago a woman in my congregation (ward) passed away. She was an older lady and was ready to return to her father in Heaven. Her passing was actually one of joy. At her funeral I was able to be around other women from my ward and we laughed and talked. there were a few tears with those that I hung around. Mostly - it was a joyful return home for her and we knew it.
However - today in church during fast and testimony meeting, I missed this woman... Sister Durtschi. She was one who would take the opportunity every chance she could to share her unwavering testimony of love and joy and faith. She was a rock! Suddenly - I missed her terribly. You never know what an impression someone has left on you until they are gone.
I began to reflect on another sweet lady I had known many many years earlier when I attended Hilliard ward in Southern Wyoming - Sister Martin. She too was a rock of faith and testimony. she was a short heavy set woman that walked with a cane. But she bore her testimony nearly every Sunday and it always started with this: "It is GOOD to be here this BEAUTIFUL Sunday morning." And then she would go on to share with us how wonderful Jesus Christ is and her unwavering testimony in his goodness and mercy and in a living prophet on the earth today and in the Book of Mormon and of the prophet Joseph Smith. She was a powerhouse. I realized today just how much she meant to me. She's been gone for many many years and I left that ward more than 20 years ago. she was gone to her father in Heaven before then. But today I missed Sister Durtschi and so I also missed Sister Martin. 2 amazing old ladies that were widows and strong faithful examples of sharing their love of their savior when the chance was given.

Brother Chuck Hardy got up to speak today and mentioned some of the things that were going on in my mind. I thought it was interesting that he would say the exact thoughts I was thinking. He mentioned that it was interesting not to have Sister D. come up and share her testimony with the rest of us and how someone needed to step up and take her place.

I felt prompted to stand and share my thoughts. I don't think my words came out as I had hoped. My thoughts were these -

You never know how much of an impression someone has made on you until they are gone. Sister Martin in the Hilliard ward was remembered by me today as I looked for the lady that would stand and share her unshaking love of the Savior with all of us. When brother Hardy issued the challenge that someone needed to step up and take her place, I did not think I ever could fill shoes like that, I am weak and struggle with so many issues, I am not on the same playing field as these ladies. I do however, feel the need - the urgency and the importance of sharing my faith in my savior Jesus Christ when the opportunity is given. But I also HOPED that others would see that their testimonies of faith were needed by others as well. I LOVE to hear how my brothers and sister in the gospel of Jesus Christ love the Lord their God. I love to hear how they overcome struggles. I feel so much closer to them and so much more hopeful after testimony meeting.
So I want to thank the Sister Durtschis, Sister Martins, Anna Mays, Daniellas, Brother what's his names and others in my life who have faithfully shared with me and the rest of us their love and faith during fast and testimony meetings. You have left an impression, your words were needed and I thank you for listening to your heart when it said "stand and share".
and to those who have done this in the past and are no longer here - You are forever in my heart. thank you. I have learned so much because of your steadfastness.