My knees hurt when I look down

No, really. When I stand at the top of something a little more than a few feet up and then I look down... my legs ache, my heart pounds, my stomache churns. I have this HORRIBLE fear of heights. I am also afraid of deep open water. I wonder if those fears are related. I decided earlier that this was year to get over my fears and go do things I have always wanted to try but have allowed my fears to hold me back.
my list of things I want to do include:
- zipline
- repelling
- rock climbing
- climb Angel's landing.
there are other things but they have nothing to do with my fears - just lack of skill I need to improve in order to get there
- Run a marathon
- do a solo triathlon
etc...
the top list is stuff I could go do today the bottom list takes some time to train up to.
BUT I haven't tried anything from the top list because I am a freaking chicken when it comes to heights. I LOVE the idea of climbing up the side of a cliff. I love hiking and bouldering around But I can't seem to bring myself to do more than that.

Guess what I did today?


The first time we went up there I was nearly dizzy just looking off the balcony. Courtney (works at Zion Ponderosa) hooked me in and told me to go. But I kept stalling. I knew it was no big deal. But I physically could NOT get my legs to move me off the balcony. SO Bill pushed me. Thanks Bill. I really thought I would be able to do it without a push, but I could NOT. Once going I was able to relax and enjoy the ride. It was safe and mellow and not that big of a deal.
I had to try it again though. I needed to be able to do it without Bill Pushing me. I needed to know that I could overcome my fears and do things that scare the hell out of me. So I did. Some of you are looking at me and thinking - dude, Michelle, what is the big deal that Zipline is wimpy. yeah, well.... SO! I was scared anyway! I would never have jumped a year ago and I did it! I am so happy! I am ready for repelling and then Angel's landing and some rock climbing! BRING IT ON!